Playing ‘hard to get’ really works and makes you seem ‘more sexually desirable’, a new study claims.
Researchers from the University of Rochester and Centre Herzliya have examined the effects of playing hard to get, and claim that making the chase harder increases your desirability.
Gurit Birnbaum, co-author of the study, said: “People who are too easy to attract may be perceived as more desperate. That makes them seem less valuable and appealing than those who do not make their romantic interest apparent right away.”
In the study, the researchers carried out several experiments to assess the effects of playing ‘hard to get’.
In one experiment, participants interacted with people whose online dating profiles indicated that they were either hard to get or easy to attract.
The results found that profiles that were hard to get were more valued and seen as more desirable as a partner.
Meanwhile, in another experiment, participants chatted to an insider via Instant Messenger. At the end, the participants were asked to leave one final message.
The researchers then analysed these chats, examining whether playing hard to get increased their sexual desirability as well as the efforts to see them again.
Again, the results showed that people who were seen as hard to get enhanced their desirability, and were more likely to be asked out again.
Overall, the research suggests that playing hard to get make you more sexually desirable, and increase your chances of a second date.
Professor Harry Reis, co-author of the study, said: “We all want to date people with higher mate value. We’re trying to make the best deal we can.”
However, the researchers highlight that this strategy isn’t for everyone.
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Professor Reis added: “If playing hard to get makes you seem disinterested or arrogant, it will backfire.”
Overall, the team suggests that daters should show initial interest in potential partners, but not reveal too much about themselves.
Dr Birnbaum explained: “[People are] less likely to desire what they already have. [Create] a sense of anticipation and a desire to learn more about the other person.”
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